Q. How do I become a member of the Eros community?
We ask all interested people to send us a message via email, voice, or text. Please reserve using your full name and the event you wish to attend. When you arrive we will check your matching ID to the event. Once we receive this information we will send you a confirmation back with the location address, directions and other helpful newcomer information. If you haven’t heard back from us within 48 hours, please send another message as we do get messages in our bulk folder occasionally.
Q. What does it cost to attend; do you have an initiation or membership fee?
Refer to our membership & dues page.
Q. How do you describe the facility location?
Our events are held at a home-like retreat center in Redmond, WA, surrounded by acres of natural and beautiful grounds. We have lots of indoor play space for group fun, as well as areas that are semi-private for intimate moments with special friends. There is a wonderful heated indoor pool plus hot tub where swimming suits are optional, a dance area with great music, and a brass pole often used for erotic and fun shows. There are two outbuilding cabins that are available during our events; one is cozy and semi-private, and has a loft and two king sized beds; a very popular semi-private area that our members enjoy. The second cabin is larger and has recently been upgraded; this space can accommodate larger groups of members/friends who want to spend time together (at least 20-30 people or more if you are friendly) and you can spread out and have a sexy scene occur without being watched by all of the other members. This is the area that works best for light BDSM. If you want to be watched or show off for the other members; inside the main building works well for that in our largest open playroom (Voyeur Room) with lots of beds and seats. Check out our tour page to view photos of various rooms inside our party location.
Q. What type of people attend the events?
We have a diverse group of friendly, social, and open minded people who attend each party. All age groups are welcome and represented at our parties. All our party themes and activities are optional participation with many rooms open to general regular activity and sexy fun.
Q. Do singles attend?
Yes — we welcome single members of any gender, and every party includes singles. New singles must attend a swim party before their first evening party, and all singles must stay in good standing to keep attending. Many people have come to their first lifestyle event with us as a single, and some have become regular attendees and staff. We rely on our security monitors, members, and community to flag anyone who isn’t a good behavioral fit; see behavior complaint for how those reports are handled.
Q. Can I bring a guest to a party?
Yes — guests of any gender are welcome, as long as the member inviting them is willing to vouch for them. We ask that you have met your guest in person — not just online — so you can vouch for their behavior and confirm they’ll follow the event and facility rules. Every guest attends orientation at their first party, and if you leave for the night, your whole party leaves together. Singles may bring a date under the same rules.
Q. Can I use a name other than my legal name?
Of course! However, for membership tracking we have to use your ID. When you attend for the first time let us know any name you would prefer to be known by and we will keep a record of it.
Q. What should we wear?
Women often wear casual clothing and sexy little outfits, and men often wear casual clothing; both may bring lingerie, robes, and towels to change into as the evening progresses. In the play areas, change into play clothes and keep outside jackets and coats out of the playrooms. We occasionally host themed events, with optional dress details for the evening.
Q. What clothing is expected around the pool area and in shared spaces?
We require minimal dress in the main social area and parking lot; full nudity is reserved for the play and pool areas. Swimsuits are optional in the pool and hot tub. See our Pool Area Rules for the specifics on glass, food, and clothing around the water.
Q. What should we bring?
We suggest you bring a small duffel bag with you to hold your items; change of clothes, robe, small play bag with your preferred safer sex items. There is a cubbyhole area available in the pool room to store your items. We do not have a locker setup so please do not bring valuables with you into the building. Instead, please lock them in your vehicle but do not set any car alarms.
Q. Is food provided?
Yes, see the potluck page.
Q. What time do the events start and how late do they go?
Refer to our parties page.
Q. What are the rules at each event?
Refer to our member agreement page.
Q. What should I do if I notice bodily fluids, used bedding, or an area that wasn’t properly cleaned?
Please let an event monitor or staff member know discreetly and promptly so we can take care of it. We provide reusable protective pads and towels at the front desk, and we ask everyone to clean up after themselves and manage their own bodily fluids after each encounter.
Q. Is smoking allowed at the events?
Not indoors, but we have a covered smoking area on our patio which is just outside and around the corner from the pool and dance area.
Q. Is BDSM permitted at Eros?
Only light BDSM — light spanking and playing with toys — and only in the detached semi-private cabin, which is also used for sexy connections, so it should never be the totality of the play happening out there. Medium and heavy BDSM are not permitted. See the Conduct & Activity definitions for what each level includes.
Q. Is it OK to bring pets if left in the car?
No, pets or animals are not permitted on the property (including left in a car) as we use a spiritual sanctuary space, and it is against the facility policies. Please contact us with any questions.
Q. Are cell phones or cameras allowed at the parties?
For our members privacy, any type of photo or video photography is strictly prohibited both inside or outside the property. We know that some members have a need to check on babysitters and other concerns, and we allow checking of messages in the couch/front desk area only.
It’s best to leave cell phones in your locked vehicle, but they can be left at the front desk or stored in a bag, or jacket, as long as it is either turned off or on silent mode and is not used inside the buildings. Usage of a cellphone for calls, text, email, etc. is best done inside your vehicle in the parking lot.
Definitions
These definitions give members and staff a shared reference point for the terms used throughout our policies. They summarize the rules described in full on our Member Agreement, Dues & Standing, and Pool Area Rules pages; please refer to those pages for complete detail.
Members and Guests
- Singles — Anyone attending on their own. New singles must attend a swim party before their first evening party, and must stay in good standing to keep attending.
- Couple — Two people who attend an event together as a pair, not necessarily their spouse or SO. Thruples and multiples are also welcome.
- Member Couple — A couple who hold current membership and are in good standing.
- Guest or Date — Someone a member brings to a party and vouches for. Guests of any gender are welcome; a guest must have been met in person, attend orientation at their first party, and leave when the hosting member leaves.
- Play Partner — A person you engage in play or sexual activity with at an event.
Areas
- Social Area — Common spaces such as reception, the dining room, and kitchen, where minimal dress is required and nudity or sexual activity is not permitted.
- Play Area — Rooms designated for sexual activity, such as the open Voyeur Room, the lawn areas between out buildings and the playrooms. For our camp out events, any camping area is also open for play.
- Semi-Private Area — Detached or enclosed spaces — such as the cabins — used for more intimate encounters away from the main play space. The larger cabin is the area where light BDSM is permitted.
Dress
- Minimal Dress — Your nipples and genitals must be covered in the main social area and parking lot. Full nudity is reserved for the play and pool areas.
- Play Clothes — Comfortable clothing, lingerie, robes, or towels that members change into for the play areas. Outside jackets and coats should be kept out of the playrooms.
- Appropriate Pool Attire — Nudity is allowed in the pool, but feel free to wear a swimsuit, aqua shoes, or t-shirts to your level of comfort. No regular clothes or shoes are allowed in the pool.
Conduct and Activity
- Sexual Activity — Nudity and sexual contact. Permitted only in the designated play areas, never in the main social area.
- Light BDSM — Light spanking, playing with penetrative or vibrating toys, fetish wear, blindfolds, and soft cuffs. Floggers, paddles, whips, wax play, electrostim, and rope bondage without hard points are allowed with prior authorization or at theme events. This is the only level of BDSM permitted at Eros. We do not have dedicated dungeon monitors, and are not trained or staffed to accommodate private supervision. Please use common sense and play safely.
- Medium BDSM — Hard restraints (handcuffs, spreader bars, etc.), whipping and flogging that leaves bruises or more, bondage to hardpoints (hooks, pillars, bed frames, etc.), and suspension. Not permitted at Eros. We aren’t prudes, but we’re also not a dungeon.
- Heavy BDSM — Needle/blood play, scat play, breath play, heavy impact, and predicament play. Not permitted at Eros. Basically if it is risky, requires after-care, or involves biohazards, it’s a no.
- Impaired — Showing the effects of alcohol, marijuana, or drugs to a degree that sober, clear consent is in doubt. Any member who appears impaired may be asked to leave.
Membership Status
- Good Standing — A member who follows the Member Agreement and Pool Area Rules, with dues paid in full and no behavior complaints.
- Behavior Complaint — A report that a member is not a good behavioral fit for our events. Complaints are tracked and may result in a temporary ban (typically 3–6 months) or permanent revocation of membership.
This page was last updated: Friday, July 3, 2026.